Dear Self,
Please make the following vow:
I will not now, nor ever, present myself in a way that is grander than my actual life and/ or being. I commit to being only me, no matter how often that puts me in a position to be passed over for promotion, to be overlooked for consideration, or to have my opinion ignored or forgotten. I will not now, nor ever, falsely advertise or promote myself or my agenda in the hopes of gaining position, friends, satisfaction, progress, or even in the hopes of helping others. No matter how noble my cause, I vow to maintain honesty and integrity as my flagship characteristics and will not excuse the ulterior motives of others even in their pursuit of spiritual fulfillment. (That ain't chyo job!) I hold fast to the commitment that I will never harbor ulterior motives of my own or join in ownership with those ulterior motives of others, beyond the moment of revelation. I do solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Isaiah 33:15-16 - He who walks righteously and speaks what is right, who rejects gain from extortion and keeps his hand from accepting bribes, who stops his ears against plots of murder and shuts his eyes against contemplating evil. This is the man who will dwell on the heights, whose refuge will be the mountain fortress. His bread will be supplied, and water will not fail him.
... So I probably will never be on the staff at a church... And I probably will never climb the corporate ladder... I don't have tolerance for self-promotion or bait-and-switch techniques. (*Not that I think the Staff Members of churches are into Self-Promotion, Let me be clear.) I do not have tolerance for peers, leaders, or students of mine to present themselves falsely to anyone else, including myself. It's sin. Sure, we've all done it... but it's Sin.
There are certain people that it is far more obvious with than others. There's the girl who has positioned herself precisely where she wants to be for that dream job-offer. Her reasoning, "Oh, I just know how to play my cards right I guess!" There's that volunteer that doesn't really do much when the Pastor, or Youth Pastor isn't looking, but as soon as one of the Head Haunchos step into the room, Bam! Lighting strikes and suddenly that same volunteer is asking everyone what he can do to help. His justification, "I just get distracted, but I really do want the Pastor to know my heart."
Who gave you the cards?... And how will ANYONE know your heart?
Leviticus 19:11 - "Do not steal. Do not lie. Do not deceive one another."
I feel like we (yes, we! I do this too...) get this tiny portion of the vision God has for our future and suddenly we've set to work, "facilitating," and "training for the field"... but HOLD ON A MINUTE! We've only seen 1 of the pieces of this 52 million piece puzzle that somehow has a zebra stripes in it. That doesn't mean head off to Zoology University OR that we should pack our bags and scoot off to Africa, claiming we're called to missions to the Zebras. (*Okay a bit ridiculous, but please go deeper with me.) What if we've seen that portion of the vision simply to inspire hope and continued tenacity in the last "task" we heard clearly from the Lord on.
God called me to go to college after high school. I firmly believe that. Once I started my first semester, I committed to my parents and myself that I would finish. Two semesters later, I failed out of the private liberal arts university my parents and I had decided on. So I moved home... waited till the next term and started again. This time I enrolled in a local state university, with borderline zero personality and even less people that I would know. It was HORRIBLE. I felt out of place, I only sort-of knew a few people that really didn't love being around me. I talked about how fantastic my old school was constantly... I felt like I was "painting pictures of Egypt, leaving out what it lacked. The future [felt] so hard and I [wanted to] go back" (Sarah Groves, Painting Pictures of Egypt). Do you know what happened at the end of that semester? I came away with all A's and 1 B.
I know that doesn't seem related to self-promotion and false advertising at all, but go with me. When I was away at my fancy Christian college, I was BUSY. I was constantly trying to network and catapult myself as a buzz-word around campus. I toured with a large vocal group and networked there too. I was so caught up in wanting to BE someone with prestige and fame and glory and riches... that I abandoned the task at hand. See, I had received a vision when I was younger that I know was from the Lord in reference to my future. In that vision, I was peeking out from behind a curtain in the wings of a very large stage. I saw people, tons of people, far past what I could see in the glaring stage-lights. And that's all... As a kid, I was certain this meant I was going to be a rock star! Hello? Stage, lights, tons of people, Heck YEAH! When I grew up a bit, I "spiritualized" my goal and determined that I was going to be a phenomenal worship leader.
My point is this: all I saw, were curtains, lights, and tons of faces. That could mean ANYTHING. Could I end up being a rock star, sure. God does crazy stuff, but I'm suspecting it won't be THAT crazy. Could I be a mega-worship leader? Absolutely, but again, I'm suspecting God won't be so typical. Maybe my vision meant that I would be a stagehand at an ultra-famous drama production? Or that I would stand back and be moral support for some other acclaimed musician? Perhaps that I would be speaking to hundreds of faces with some to-be-determined word of wisdom that God implanted in me? Or maybe, it wasn't a positive thing at all. Maybe God wanted me to see the potential faces that I could have reached, but didn't. Or maybe, I'd attend some crazy large conference and have to come to a critical decision in my life? Or maybe He wanted me to see the masses and be compelled into action? The thing is, we cannot accurately fill in the entirety of the picture when we only have the bottom-right corner piece of the 52 million piece puzzle; It just doesn't work that way.
How does that relate to self-promotion? Well, I genuinely believe that when we position ourselves for the ideal circumstance, we've stopped trusting God to put the picture together, and started scratching out what we THINK He was going to do. That isn't honest Christianity- that's a parade of Mr. Good Intentions justifying Mrs. Manipulative Behavior's actions. It pains me to see people I know, some very dear to my heart, setting themselves up just exactly how they think it ought to be, when all it is, is their attempt at self-protection. I know that's what it comes down to. I mean it must! They don't trust that God sets up some crazy circumstances for the unlikely to be promoted and for unexpected favor to come to the least likely candidate for the position. It hurts me also, to see leaders, Pastors, Youth Pastors, State Officials, even traditional bosses, all fall for the same deception. It feels so obvious to me that I want to go around town blasting through a loud-speaker, "So-and-So doesn't care about you or your mission! They only want the security of knowing they have a definite place and position and that you bless the work of their hands!"
Somehow I don't think that would go too terribly well.
Deuteronomy 25:15-16 - You must have accurate and honest weights and measures, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you. For the Lord your God detests anyone who does these things, anyone who deals dishonestly.
It comes to this: I think it's high time we stop excusing this sort of behavior. We can't accept that for ourselves, for our peers, for our students, or for our leaders. Each of us need the assurance of the Lord that HE is the one giving us favor and opportunity. He is the one blessing us and promoting and defending us; Not ourselves or those we've connived into being on our team. No more rallying of the troops by way of deception, no more Campaign trails with over-applied make up to cover impending wrinkles, no more playing secret defense for tomorrow while we're watching yesterday's game. We each, including myself, have got to take a stand for honesty. We MUST. Not just honesty when asked direct questions, but we must display our shortcomings, desires, visions, hinderances, concerns, passions, relationships, and our very lives honestly. It's no easy task, I know. No one particularly enjoys outing themselves when it comes to failures, but as my mom and dad have always said, "Covering it up only makes it worse. If you had told us as soon as it started or even mid-way through, we could've helped you."
Proverbs 16:8 - Better a little with righteousness than much gain with injustice.
For further examples and explanation: Re-read Genesis chapters 25-50 which holds the story of Jacob and Esau, the selling of the birthright, and the stealing of the blessing.
